Top tips

SHOES LAST twice as long if only worn every other day.

NORTHERNERS. On hot summer nights go to bed wearing a shower cap full of frozen peas to cool your head. And when you wake up you'll have a tasty mushy pea snack ready for breakfast.

FOREIGNERS. Improve your English swearword vocabulary by dawdling aimlessly with your friends in front of the entrance to Oxford Circus tube station at 5.30pm every afternoon. Advanced linguists might like to try zig-zagging down the steps at a snail's pace while texting everyone back home.