I'VE JUST recieved my new local council tax bill, and I note that it has gone up by Ł200 this year. This is in part to fund a new lesbian drop-in centre. I'm not opposed to this in principle, but I think after forking out for it, the least they could do is let me in to watch
WE SHALL fight them on the beaches, we shall fight them in the fields and on the landing grounds, said Churchill in 1939. Unusual use of the word 'we'. I was on Omaha Beach having my leg shot off and I can't remember seeing Winnie anywhere. Perhaps I missed the bit where he said We shall fight them 50 feet underground in a reinforced concrete bunker."
IF I UNDERSTAND it correctly, Osama Bin Laden's two main achievements so far have been to reduce airline prices, and to stop Americans leaving their country and clogging up ours. So what exactly were we bombing him for? We should give him a fucking knighthood.